THE CHEMISTRY: SECRETS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT LOVE RELATIONSHIP (LOVE SECRET 3)
“People
gravitate to those who give them care, attention and respect. Love
language is a hearty and pure action mastered by true lovers”
It
is generally believed that the foundation of every relationship is
good communication. But understanding the need of good communication
in a relationship is more important than
just professing love to your potential partner. It is expedient you
understand that every relationship either thrives or dies based on
the communication level between partners. Good communication is very
important in building the chemistry of partners and this will help to
keep them bonded in their love journey no matter what happens between
them. The secret to building the chemistry in your relationship is to
discover and effectively communicate the love languages of your
partner.
THE
SECRET TO BUILDING THE CHEMISTRY IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS TO DISCOVER
AND EFFECTIVELY COMMUNICATE THE LOVE LANGUAGES OF YOUR PARTNER
THE
MOMENT OF TRUTHS
In
customer service, the moment of truths is the instance of contact or
interaction between a customer and a firm (through a product, sales
force, or visit) that gives the customer an opportunity to form (or
change) an impression about the firm. In the same way, many
relationships really need to incessantly practice the moment of
truths principle. Many partners need it to change the way they see
each other so as to help their compatibility in love relationships.
They need to also open up on things they like and don’t like about
each other. This will go a long way in healing the hurts and building
the love they share. The toxic nature of most dating relationships
and marriages in the world today is disheartening. The high rate of
marital divorces and the breakups of dating relationships are mostly
caused by ineffective and lack of love language communication. One of
the ways to find the right partner for a relationship is to evaluate
how well the person communicates and reciprocates the love you show
them. It’s certainly down to finding out the truth about what the
person feels for you. Love is more than just words. It is a function
of understanding expressed through good actions. In his best-selling
book: ‘The Five Love Languages’, Relationship Expert, Dr. Gary
Chapman extensively talked about how people can communicate love in
different ways. He compares it speaking different languages. The
truth is that we all have a primary love language – the native
tongue we all grew up speaking, and if we later learn more languages,
we all most certainly feel comfortable conversing in our native
language. I certainly agree with Dr. Chapmann. In the same vein, when
people don’t understand each other’s language, it will be
difficult for them to communicate with each other effectively, or
even at all. Also, I certainly believe that in the area of love it is
quite similar. Your emotional love language and that of your
potential date may be different as German is different from French
language. If that is the case, then have in mind that matter how hard
you both try to express love in your individual love languages to
each other, your relationship will not stand the test of time until
you both learn, understand and effectively communicate each other’s
love language.
THINGS
YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES
Dr.
Chapmann identified five emotional love languages which are: Words of
affirmation, Acts of service, Receiving gifts, Quality time and
Physical touch. It is expedient you understand that most people
communicate love in just one or two of these ways. It is also
important you realize that most people show love in the way they
would like to receive it. They may think they are effectively
communicating their partner’s love language, but the truth is that
they are actually not doing so. You can be and find the right partner
for a relationship if you can follow these key points on the love
languages:
-
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
The
basis of this love language is assurance. When someone tells you that
he/she loves you, you need to look for the assurance in what the
person has said especially if this is your love language. What’s
makes it special? How often does the person use reassuring words,
kind words, encouraging words and complimentary words in his/her
communication with you at all times? Does the person prefer using
abusive words, derogatory remarks, words of comparison, and
provocative words towards you?. Always have in mind that words are
powerful – it can tear down and destroy just as easily as it can
build and create. Go for someone who will sweep you off your feet and
spoil you silly with genuine words.
THE
BASIS OF WORDS OF AFFIRMATION AS A LOVE LANGUAGE IS ALL ABOUT GIVING
ASSURANCE TO YOUR PARTNER AND MAKING HIM/HER FEEL VALUED AND WANTED
-
ACTS OF SERVICE
The
basis of this love language is help. How often does the person give
you a helping hand in things you do? Acts of service as a love
language is a call to responsibility. Helping with the little things
you need assistance with is a way of knowing if a person is
compatible enough for a dating relationship. If the person can’t
help or show up when you need them, how sure are you that they will
be there in the happy future that they have promised to create for
both of you? Relationship is a two-way street and it takes two people
to build it the way they want it to be. It’s a perfect bedding
ground for partners to build the spirit of synergy.
ACTS
OF SERVICE AS A LOVE LANGUAGE HELPS IN
CREATING
A PERFECT BEDDING GROUD FOR PARTNERS TO BUILD THE SPIRIT OF SYNERGY
-
QUALITY TIME
The
basis of this love language is undivided attention. If this is your
love language, you needed to look out for someone who’s ready to
always be with you and gives you his attention. How often is he/she
willing to spend time with you interrupted? Does the person find you
disturbing than fun to be with? Does the person see no need for both
of you to spend time together, but rather sees it as a waste of time.
The way a person treats you in this regard reveals much about how
they will treat you in the long run.
-
RECEIVING GIFTS
The
basis of this love language is appreciation and thoughtfulness. When
gifts are given, this delivers a message from the giver to the
receiver. It is just a way of telling you that they have you in their
thoughts and on their mind. Also, it shows that the person really
value and appreciate having you in his/her life. The gifts do not
necessarily need to be expensive and it’s usually very sweet and
special when given on memorable dates like birthdays, wedding
anniversaries, or even as a surprise package. If this is your love
language, then you need to ask yourself how often you receive gifts
from your potential partner. Sacrificial giving, and not exploitative
giving is a proof of love .Even God gave us His begotten, Jesus
Christ to save us from condemnation as a proof of His love for
mankind - John 3:16(GNT)
-
PHYSICAL TOUCH
The
basis of this love language is show of affection. For married people,
this is demonstrated through acts of romance and sex. But for singles
in a God-centered relationship, physical touch could be demonstrated
in terms of showing concern for the well-being of your potential
partner. How often does he/she call you to know how you’re faring?
How interested is he/she with how you go about your daily life and
activities. It is often said that people never really care how much
you know until they know how much you care.
--- by Nwosu Obichi
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